Amazon vs Neteller

Hi,

as Jens’ partner for complaining (and rarely praising) the worlds services and products, he has kindly invited me to contribute to this blog.

So to get started I might as well contribute to Jens’ Neteller experience.

Unlike Jens, I passed Neteller’s stringent and completely random/pointless security checks, and am even the proud owner of a Neteller Mastercard. Just to confirm, I almost pocked one of my eyes out with a spoon to lessen then pain, during the many and lengthy conversations I have had with them. I think Neteller’s recruitment questions go something like this –
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Do you have an IQ between 82 and 99?
Can you barely speak English?
Do you have severe problems doing any form of rational thinking?
Have you in the past managed to piss someone off so much that they foamed from the mouth and ruptured a blood vessel on their head?

If you answered yes to ALL of the above questions, you are perfect for the Neteller Support Service and we would love for you to join our team.
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Ok, so I am going off track. After recently receiving my new shiny Neteller Mastercard I transferred some money on it and was ready to make some online purchases. I went to Amazon to buy a Nintendo Wii controller for my new Wii. (By the way, in trying to purchase one Wii I managed to buy 3, but more on that next blog) So, I make the purchase for £28 pounds, and within 1.76 nano seconds, I get an email from Amazon saying –
“Dear Amazon Customer,
the card you have tried to use to make this purchase is sooo dodgy, we have insta-declined your purchase and locked your account for the rest of eternity. “

GREAT! Even better is that they have charged my card 3 times with £28, so a total £84… As a reward for this, I don’t get my controller and get my account blocked.

I call Amazon, and try to explain that I am not the new al qaeda, and that there is no reason to block my account. They said, no worries just answer these simple questions. “What product did you buy from Amazon on the 14th of May 2003.” Like the $uc$ I know that… Christ sake… Then they ask me to simply send in the Neteller Card statement and all will be good.

I call Neteller and ask them whats happening and they guy answers
“Siw, I hab a ook in di fu u”
Great, this guy definitely answered YES to all of Neteller’s recruitment questions.
Bottom line here – Neteller doesn’t send out card statements… Fantastic!

To cut a long story short, after 6 emails to Amazon, and 4 calls with Neteller, neither of them will refund me the £84 as both deny that they have the funds, and at best I will receive them after the clearing house releases them in 180 days. WTF?

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I propose the following

Save a friend from Neteller

Entry Form

To participate in NETELLER's Save a friend from Neteller Program, please provide your name and email address, along with the email addresses of up to five friends (per invitation page).